ʻO nā kiʻiʻoniʻoni a mākou e nānā nei, nā hōʻike TV a mākou e inu nei a me nā puke a mākou e heluhelu ai e hahai mau i ka manaʻo like i ka wā e pili ana i ke aloha: He pāʻani hoʻokahi a hoʻokahi. ʻOiaʻiʻo, i kekahi manawa aia nā triangles dramatic, akā hoʻoholo pinepine ʻia kēia me kahi koho o hoʻokahi suitor. Akā i ke ola maoli, ʻike ka poʻe maoli iā lākou iho i nā triangles me ka ʻole o ka Anna Karenina keaka. Ua ʻike ʻia kēia he pilina triad. Mai hopohopo, e wehewehe mākou, me ke kōkua o ka male ʻana a me ka hoʻoponopono ʻohana R achel D. Mille r , o ka Focht Family Practice ma Chicago.
He aha ka pilina triad?
Inā kapa ʻia kahi pilina maʻamau he dyad (ʻelua poʻe), a laila ʻo ka triad kahi pilina polyamorous i ʻekolu mau kānaka. E noʻonoʻo iā ia ma ke ʻano he subset o polyamory. Akā ʻaʻole like nā triad a pau. Hōʻike ʻo Miller iā mākou e hiki i nā triads ke lawe i nā ʻano like ʻole: Hiki i nā lālā ʻekolu o ka triad ke pili kekahi i kekahi, a i ʻole kekahi lālā ka pivot o ka pilina V. ʻO ka pilina V (e like me ke ʻano) ʻo ia hoʻi he kanaka hoʻokahi (ka pivot) i loko o kahi pilina me ʻelua mau kānaka, a ʻo kēlā mau kānaka ʻelua, ʻoiai e ʻae ana, ʻaʻole pili kekahi i kekahi.
ʻAe, no ke aha e hana ai nā kānaka i kēia pilina?
He ʻano like ia me ka nīnau ʻana i kekahi mau kāne no ke aha lāua i hui pū ai—he nui nā kumu no ka ʻae ʻole o ka monogamy: aloha, kuko, ʻoluʻolu, kūpaʻa, a pēlā aku. , akā, ʻo ka mea i loaʻa iā lākou ka mea maʻamau, he wehe i kahi ʻano kuʻuna ʻole e aloha ai a pili i ka pilina. Eia kekahi mau kumu ma hope o kahi pilina triad āna i lohe ai i nā makahiki:
1. Ua manaʻo kekahi mau kāne me he mea lā ua piha ko lāua hui ʻana i ke aloha, a makemake lāua e kaʻana like i kēlā me kekahi kanaka.
2. Ua manaʻo ʻo Polyamory ma mua o kahi koho, no laila ʻaʻole ʻo kahi dyad i ʻāpana o kā lākou ʻike no ka pilina.
3. Ua aloha kekahi kanaka i ʻelua mau kānaka ʻokoʻa a makemake ʻo ia e hoʻomau i ka pilina me nā mea ʻelua, a ua ʻaelike nā mea a pau e pili ana i ka hoʻonohonoho.
4. Ua lilo ka hoaaloha o kekahi mau hoa ma mua o ka hoaloha no kekahi a i ʻole nā hoa ʻelua, a ua hoʻoholo lāua ma ke ʻano he hui e hoʻonui i ka pilina e hoʻokomo iā lākou a pau.
5. Ua makemake kekahi mau kāne e hoʻohui i nā mea ʻala i ko lāua ola moe kolohe, a i ka hana ʻana pēlā, ua ʻike ʻia kekahi kanaka ʻē aʻe a lāua i pili ai ma nā pae he nui.
He mea paʻakikī kēia. He aha nā dynamics o ka pilina triad?
E like me ka ikaika o kekahi pilina, hiki ke ʻokoʻa mai ka polygroup a i ka polygroup. Akā, e like me Miller, ʻo kekahi mau mea maʻamau o kahi triad olakino e pili ana i ke aloha maoli a me ka mālama ʻana i nā mea a pau e pili ana, nā ʻōnaehana kākoʻo nui (hiki kēia i ka manaʻo, kālā, etc.) ko lakou ola ana. Ua wehewehe ʻo Miller i loko o kekahi poly a consensually non-monogamous pilina, nā mea e pono ai ka ʻae ʻana a me ka mana a me ka hiki ke hoʻoponopono hou i nā huaʻōlelo i mea e loaʻa ai i nā lālā a pau ka mea e pono ai lākou mai ka pilina.
He aha nā pilikia e kū nei ka poʻe ma nā pilina kuʻuna?
ʻO kēlā me kēia mea e kūʻē i ka palaoa e kū i kahi paʻakikī. Wahi a Miller, he mau ʻohana kākoʻo koʻikoʻi kekahi mau triad e kākoʻo iā lākou a ʻae i kā lākou koho me ka lima hāmama. ʻAʻole hiki i nā poʻe ʻē aʻe ke hele piha i ko lākou ʻohana a me nā hoaaloha no ka mea ʻaʻole maopopo lākou e ʻae ʻia lākou. Ua hoʻonohonoho ʻia ka ʻahahui e kākoʻo i nā manaʻo kuʻuna e pili ana i ka male-e laʻa, ʻelua mau kānaka i loko o ka pilina hiki ke pale ʻia e ke kūlana male ma ke kānāwai, haʻi mai ʻo Miller iā mākou. Hiki i nā hopena o kēia ke waiho i kahi lālā o kahi triad me ka manaʻo ʻaʻole palekana a i ʻole ka liʻiliʻi o ka mana i loko o ka pilina. ʻO ka hoʻoponopono? E like me kekahi pilina: kamaʻilio maikaʻi a kamaʻilio wehe.
PILI: ʻO nā lula pili ākea ākea a pehea e hoʻonohonoho ai i kāu
